Which brings me to Saturday and the lecture. They were able to get Peter David, Harlan Ellison, and Neil Gaiman in one room. I've been a fan of Peter David ever since I saw his B5 episodes and Centauri trilogy. He was good. I only know Ellison from his work with JMS in "Babylon 5". He made a good cameo as a Psi Cop in the episode "The Face of the Enemy." He was an asshole on stage. His short stories sucked. Neil Gaiman contains the usual razor wit you'd expect from a Brit, especially when talking about his "crazy hair." The questions afterward were...ack...enough said. When the lecture was over, I spent 2.5 hours getting another Centauri trilogy signed by Peter David to give to auror. She never read it. Maybe an autographed copy will tweek her curiosity when she is not doing problem sets.
Played B5 CCG. Lost my entire Psi Corp deck. (Long story)
Monday. There have been debates over whether this is a holiday or not. No school for MIT students. School for Florida students. Either way, I had to go to work. I took a lunch break and went to see a movie at Kendall Square. I had some trepidation about this. One, because it was in the middle of work. Two, because each time I saw a movie in the Kendall Square theater, I come out with some in-depth, introspective feelings about my life. When I saw "Center of the World," I understood the need for real relationships and compassion after watching a couple share a fake relationship. Unfortunately, this cost me my relationship with Ween. When I saw "Ghost World," I understood the need to explore beyond the confines of your persona or world. I needed to get more of a life.
Now I saw a movie called "Innocence" which explored the concept of passionate love even at an old age. One must need to love uncondiitonally and not just another, but life itself. I've been hesitant to do that. There are times when I see myself in battle or as a young man when I was little. However, I couldn't vision myself as an old man or as someone who will settle down with a wife and kids. It's as if I wasn't going to make it that far. With the attacks on Afghanistan, this is heightened. I've accepted death or the possibility of death for so long that it has affected my perception of life. I had to give up joy, pleasure, fear, and others because they are of the moment. I knew that they would turn to ash. I couldn't enjoy life because I knew that it won't last.
This ends now.